Growing Pains

It's been hard for Neil to hear his recent test results. The therapists and psychologists are as kind as possible--praising him first for his attitude of perseverance and his friendly and cooperative manner--before they share his scores that often fall in the "below average" or "impaired" range. He understands that that's to be expected because of the injury. He also understands that he's continually improving and we're all working and hoping for a near full recovery. But it still hurts to have those scores stated out loud. As I see his face drop a little my heart aches, but I also recognize that his reaction represents progress in two ways. First, he is growing in his ability to see the big picture, to recognize his deficits, to understand what he needs to do to fix them. Secondly, Neil is able to feel the emotion of sadness. Without that sensation he would not be able to recognize joy. Experiencing that full range of emotion is going to be so much more satisfying for him than the flat existence he was living only a few months ago.

As it turns out, Neil is not ready for Kessler's cognitive program--not just yet. For now, Neil will be spending his mornings at the high school this fall getting some help with skills that he's lost and getting a chance to socialize with teens again. (Yay!) Then we'll be off to Chester for his usual therapies in the afternoon. It will be a busy schedule, but he can't wait for school to start!

The Worth of a Soul

Neil and I sat in a conference room at the high school this morning discussing the results of his recent evaluations and his IEP. As we listened to the school personnel discuss their findings and options for the upcoming school year I was overwhelmed with gratitude for the resources available to Neil and to us. So much time has been spent already in planning for his success. Neil's own goals have been at the top of everyone's list and we are all coordinating efforts to work toward that aim. Neil must have been experiencing similar feelings as my own as he leaned over and said, "My accident has sure charged the school a lot, as well as you and Dad." I wasn't sure what he was saying at first, but as he tried to explain I realized that by "charged" he meant "cost." He was referring to all that had been done, and would yet be done for him--medically, therapeutically, educationally--by so many. I don't know if he perceives it yet as more than just a money issue, but it's interesting to see him begin to grasp the magnitude of what has happened to all our lives. As we walked out to the car after our meeting, Neil said he felt like an idiot for getting into that accident. Of course we talked about accidents being just that--accidents--and that it was pointless to fret about a past that can't be changed. But he finally smiled when I pointed out that he might want to look at the "cost" he referred to as an indicator of his value. It takes a village, an extended family, loyal friends, teachers, doctors, professionals, volunteers, and so many more to help a boy meet his potential. But it's worth it. He's worth it.

Good For What Ails You

Botox--It's not just for wrinkles any more.

Neil had six injections in his left arm on Monday. You might be able to see some of the injection spots in the picture if you click on it. By Thursday he should start to feel some relaxation in the muscles that have been so tight. This will give the competing muscles a chance to get stronger so that he can gain some control of his left hand. Although movement in his hand and arm have s-l-o-w-l-y been improving with therapy, we're hoping this miracle drug will give him a little boost to speed up the process. He practiced playing video games yesterday and was a little disappointed that it was still hard, but he wasn't surprised. He knows it's going to take more time, more therapy, and a few more series of injections. Neil is no stranger to being patient. In fact, he's getting pretty good at it by now.

Speaking of more injections, Neil is not worried about getting the shots any more. He found out that the Teflon coated needles they used were painless!

It's a Bird...It's a Plane...

The Young family reunion held in Utah recently had the subtle theme of "Superman" in Neil's honor. I say subtle because no one wanted to embarrass him by making a big deal over him--and yet, how could they not? These were grandparents, cousins, aunts, and uncles who had fasted and prayed for a miracle and here was one standing right in front of them! The original plan was to play the movie theme as he walked into the house, but they didn't, which was probably a good idea. He was a little shy at first--there were twenty-eight people ready to give him a hug!

Acing the Serve

Neil proved true to the comic book hero's namesake on our trip. He hiked nearly two miles up a steep and rocky trail to some hot springs, then came down the same trail after a soak in the water. He swam, bowled, played volleyball (and made some great one-handed serves!) He braved the chilly water at a mountain reservoir. He did everything the clan did. Even we, who see him everyday, were amazed at his confidence and his abilities.

at the hot springs with Alison and cousins

We almost didn't make it to this reunion. At the time we had to make our plane reservations Neil was not quite to the point where we would have been comfortable taking him so far from home. We weren't sure how he would react to crowded quarters with so many people. But when the departure date rolled around, we knew we'd done the right thing in buying the tickets. He was ready. And how glad we were to put our arms around those loved ones who had kept Neil in their hearts continually since January 24th and thank them for their love and support!

Several years ago, we attended a YMCA family camp with my brother and his family. We enjoyed the enthusiastic staff who led us in singing grace at mealtime. One of the blessings on the food was sung to the Superman movie theme song. The words began, "Thank you God, for giving us food..." Throughout our recent reunion I heard the same song in my head with the words, "Thank you God, for giving us Neil!" I know I wasn't the only one singing that silent prayer.

You can join us here. Start singing at around 44 seconds!

Oh Happy Day!

Neil turns 19 today! He had sesame chicken for breakfast already. He's looking forward to Chipotle with friends for lunch. We'll have pizza for dinner. What more could a kid ask for? Of course root beer will be involved. Neil is passionate about his food these days, and these are his favorites.

Yesterday was six months out from the accident. His gift to us on his birthday is his amazing progress and happy spirit. What more could parents ask for?

Call or text him a happy birthday message, or comment here and I'll be sure he sees it.

Thank you!

Testing, 1-2-3

Everybody wants to know what's going on in Neil's brain. At the beginning all we had was what could be seen on his CT scans--obvious extensive damage, but no way to know just how he would be affected. As Neil started waking up, moving, and reacting, more could be deduced about the extent of the injury. Since then, he has worked very hard to regain use of his body, and he has spent much time trying to relearn speech and language skills. We've been amazed as we've witnessed the wheels in his head spin as he tries to retrieve facts from his past 18 years of learning. He's reached a point in his rehabilitation, and his attention span is such, that he is ready to give us some more clues. Testing in earnest has begun!

Neil has lately been sitting for hours at a time being evaluated by psychologists, speech therapists, a learning consultant, and a social worker--representatives from both Kessler and the school district. And there are more tests to come. Just the ability for him to stay on task for those long periods is progress in deed. At the end of all this, efforts will be coordinated by both institutions and us to find the best path for Neil's future goals: college, a career, a social life, a family.

We all want to know what's going to happen this Fall. Most assumptions are that he'll be at the high school getting some remedial courses to help get him as close as possible to where he was academically. He wants very much to attend the local community college to get ready to eventually transfer to BYU-Idaho, the school where he was originally accepted. I want to see him in Kessler's CRP (Cognitive Rehabilitation Program). In addition to these possibilities, Neil is still needing his speech, occupational, and physical therapies. How will we coordinate all these plans and resources? Stay tuned to find out!

Independence Day

News worthy of fireworks and parades: Assistance is no longer needed for showering. Enough said on the subject.