Deja Vu

Why does it feel like we've done this before? That vacant, trusting look on his face is so familiar--as is the way he wants to hold my hand, or sit right next to his dad instead of a few feet away. When he wants to get out of his chair before he's finished eating (even though he admits he's still hungry), I could swear I'm repeating the same things I've already said about staying in your seat until you're done. Guess we've gone back in time a bit. He'll grow out of this, just like he did before. In the mean time, I get to enjoy my little boy again.

Funny thing is, at other times, he can be quite alert and attentive to what's being said. He may respond the way he used to before the accident. Then sometimes, he's in a kind of dreamland where odd things are happening around him that he can't explain. He takes it all in stride and I guess we should, too. It takes time for a brain to rewire itself and figure out the world again.

Neil has a new bed. It's kind of like the bed tent he used to have as a kid. He loved that thing--used to take it outside and drag a sleeping bag, some snacks, and a tape player into it. This bed also has a tent on it, with zippers that only open from the outside. We weren't sure why his doctor felt it was necessary. Now we do. Neil has a tendency to get up and walk...on his own. The problem with that is his tentative balance, his disorientation, and his unprotected brain on his right side. It's too important to take a chance on his safety, so we are all going to make sure he stays put during the night. We'll also have to be more diligent during the day. If we don't watch him at all times, he'll get up to sit by us, close the door, go to the bathroom, or who knows what. Any of those things would be fine if some one were standing by his side reminding him to lock his brakes first, or walking with him in the right direction. I love the fact that he is more physically capable and confident, but this phase scares me. I do believe it's a step in the right direction, though.

P.S. Neil's feeding tube was removed this morning, so no more tubes or attachments! We just have to make sure he eats enough. He had his first pizza and a Burrito Bol from Chipotle this week. If that doesn't add calories, I don't know what will!